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I'm throwing a house party...the only person invited is you Call the cops... Hey, is it just me, or are we destined to be married? I only thought about you once today--I just never stopped.

I like my coffee like I like my women...sealed in an air tight bag in the freezer You might want to call a bomb squad, because there's going to be an explosion in your anus "There's a tornado, come in my basement" Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you. " My couch pulls out, but I don't I wanna eat the flavors off your tampon I just want to be friends...your insides Hi, I'm a fashion photographer. Hi, I've been undressing you with my eyes all night long, and think it's time to see if I'm right. If you ever want to see your children again, you'll do what I want. (look at a girl's crotch then her eyes) "You gonna eat that?

Help, somethings wrong with my eyes - I just can't take them off you. I got u something special baby, it's the condom I used when I lost my virginity Hi, I'm the new Milkman. I think I feel like Richard Gere - I'm standing next to you, the Pretty Woman. or do I I find your lack of nudity disturbing Do you wipe front to back or back to front? I want to take your skin off and wear it as my own I have a van out the back and there is free candy in it.

Excuse me, I just noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you notice that I noticed you too. That outfit would look great crumpled in a heap on unsolved mysteries "I put the STD in STUD, all I need is U..." I wanna live in your socks so I can be with you every step of the way. CRUTCHES "Does this rag smell like chloroform to you? Hi, (look her up and down) you'll do Guy walks up and checks your tag- "just what I thought..in heaven." Do I know you from somewhere, because I don't recognize you with your clothes on? I'm a necrophiliac, so why don't you drop dead and I'll think about it! Just say yes now and I won't have to spike your drink.

I've had quite a bit to drink, and you're beginning to look pretty good.

I would drag my balls through 200 yards of broken glass to kiss the dick that fucked you last.

Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?

Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams.

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